Listen generously

When you listen generously to people they can hear the truth in themselves, often for the first time.


Many of my posts have been written about holding space for each other, recognizing the need to be heard and valued.  This quote unveils the truth and power of what “listening generously” can bring about.  When we are in an argumentative or defensive stance we can not hear, we can only protect and project.  It suggests if we allow people to speak what they believe to be their truth they can drop their fight and hear the truth in themselves, perhaps even for the first time.  Let’s try that!!

”Blessings on your journey”

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Who and how do we serve?

Lately I’ve been working with a group of managers as they develop a team culture for their business.  They have been working with a highly qualified consulting company that specializes in their line of service work.  They have created programs and guidance to provide leadership with the tools, schedules and goals in which to execute.

Our management team has done a good job with its execution and we have arrived at a point where the new team culture is becoming a reality. To insure its success the management team has become more focused on implementing proper training and support, and have done it well.

At the end of a recent consultants meeting I brought up the concept of the “customer experience”.  I asked what was being done to insure the experience to the customer was improved and offered an idea of how I could see it improving.  While they have done a great job creating this new culture it really struck me how protective they became in protecting it, as they shot down my recommendation.

Often times in life we do things for the right reasons but forget why we’re really  there in the first place.  In the service business (and every business) we exist because of the customer, and if that customer is not served they will leave.  Let’s not forget!!

”Blessings on your journey”

Remember me

Today I get the privelage of speaking at the funeral of a friend.  This is what I will say.

We have come here today to witness and take part in the mystery of life’s journey.  Much like all of our journeys in life, our presence symbolizes our commitment and love for each other, and our love and appreciation for the life of     ____________________________________________________________________ .

In this life’s journey we experience transformational events that change and form the fabric and direction of our lives.  Today we come to one of those moments, a moment that represents a significant change, a soon to be new normal in our life and the life of __________________________________________________________.   While we cannot imagine where this road will take us right now, we can take strength in the fact we won’t be traveling it alone, for it is the same path that has been taken by all who have gone before us, and a path that we to will follow.  It is a natural and normal part of the human condition.

Be assured that comfort can be found in our hearts and memories.  It is the story of  our life that brings light and meaning to our existence and what we represent to each other.  So, before we leave here today to complete this physical journey on earth, take pause to remember.  Remember and carry with us all that serves and honors us and let go of that which no longer serves us.


Called on to lead!

I’m quite taken by the reactions and behaviors of all those in the political and media world today. Looking from afar and painting with a big brush, it would appear there is a war being waged.  I say that because of the expressions I see being represented, like hatred, fear, distaste, distrust, disgust, (add your feeling here).  There are also some that are inspired, and supportive, etc. (add your feeling here).

What concerns me the most is the light it shines on who we are as a people, because it speaks volumes about our character.  What has happened to today’s leaders? I have always appreciated the leader who inspires and moves me, Jesus, Buda, Mother Theresa, Nelson Mandela, Gandhi, Martin Luther King, Abraham Lincoln, (add your name here).  It was easy to try and follow their  doctrines, beliefs, and message if we just believed.  For thousands of years we were trained trained and taught to be followers, following the beliefs and doctrines of others, it has been our path, our history. Now we are being called to move beyond the old ways that no longer serve us and into a brave new world.

We are being called to find a place of peace in an age of personal and spiritual development. Unfortunately, we’re beginning this development like children in our late teens or maybe younger (remember what that was like?). You can see it in our actions and behaviors, so be kind, it to will pass (it may also be the end of us too).  I also believe, more importantly, that “we” are being called, that each and everyone of us is being called to step up and lead, (take a big breath). And, lead by finding a place within us where we have never gone before. The good news is, all we need to do, is be willing.  So, I would like to suggest you join me in finding that leader that breathes, inspires and moves within each of us.  That leader who up until now has been hiding, and secretly waiting for this very moment.  That leader that holds space for and supports each other, that leader that loves, and leads without judgement, allowing for compromise and growth. That leader that listens. That leader in YOU and ME.

”Blessings on your journey”

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Whatever I focus on, I experience.

So, whenever I focus on or talk about “what is” or “what was,” even if I’m just explaining to a friendly ear, I project more of the same into the future.

If I focus on asking more than giving thanks, I’ll believe less in my own power.

And if I insist that it’s hard and that I’m not good enough , I find that it is, and I am.

And, when I choose to focus on what I like, what I love, and how amazing I am.   I am!

”Blessings on your journey”

Flow group revisited!


Two years later !  Last night I had the privilege of reuniting with members of my flow group from two years ago in Los Angeles.

When I went to Los Angeles in March 2017, I was well into a transformational event journey.  I had written and published a book and was looking forward to expanding my reach personally, spiritually, emotionally and professionally.   I had always thought or more accurately hoped that my journey to enlightenment was a trip where I could go from 0 to full enlightenment overnight, I did not realize or want to understand that life did not work that way (at least for most of us). While I did not encounter full, embodied, enlightenment on this trip, it did ignite a new beginning, a new opportunity.

When I left Los Angeles, I began a daily regimen of meditation with the intention of developing a marketing strategy for my book with the possibility of speaking engagements, travel and professional acknowledgement etc.  It took me 6 – 7 months to realize that vision or dream was not working and it has morphed into a movement of one book at a time, personal gifts to families I serve and meet, and a gift to friends. So in my old thinking, once again I was not good enough, yet, it prompted me to begin a 100 day journey of blogging and sharing my thoughts with the world on a public stage (to date this is my 389th post!).  This new journey helped me establish my new publicly acknowledged mantra of living life “authentically and honestly”  this theme has breathed new life into me and has become my anchor for all that I do.  FYI, I probably run at around 70% – 80% in my effectiveness sometimes higher, sometimes lower.

Recently I attended an Esther Hicks seminar in Florida.  During that experience she used an analogy of how life’s journey is a variety of different and individual trips, spread out  throughout our days, weeks months, years lifetime etc. (not my 0 to enlightenment wish, but a life changing thought never the less).  My mind instantly imagined the Uber app with little digital cars moving around – and much like the Uber app, those moving cars can and do represent the many different and infinite possibilities moving around us all the time as we navigate our day, week, year, lifetime.  We make the choices to engage or not with the different rides and go on those adventures or journeys.

I also recently had a conversation about Joy with a friend who asked me what I did that was fun or I really liked.  I had a hard time answering that.  What I realized was that I spend most of my time and energy preparing the way for others.  Not to fix anything, but to create safe spaces and a smooth journey for those along for the ride.  While I am very good at it and it gives me great pleasure to do it, she suggested that along the way I try and take moment’s to find the good time that I can personally have. I have recently tried this and voila, it is indeed possible 😊

Today, I find myself in a professional place of transitioning out of my career identity of funeral director and owner.  I find myself re-engaging with music, both personally and with my grand kids and family, I find myself supporting friends and artists who express joy and breath love and life back into our community.  I find myself living a sober lifestyle or should I say struggling to find a balance with addictive personalities and distractions from my authentic and honest theme.

I find myself continuing to blog on a less stringent schedule, I find myself looking to find ways to bring people together in spaces that encourage listening and honoring each other’s space and ideas. I find myself on the verge of creating my next book by using over a year of my past posts from my blog.

And after being asked by my son and future daughter in law, I find myself sharing in the ceremony, by presiding over their marriage with words of connection, honor, peace and love.

All in all not a bad place to be even in the midst of the worlds disfunction, hate and discord.

I also find myself in the place of wishing to Thank you for your time and dedication for bringing us all together and honoring us in this way and in this place today.  It is a gift for me to reunite and share our story.  It is a gift to be honored by you and a gift for us to honor you.

“Blessings on your journey”

Bon voyage!

I have been moved to be a better leader, mentor, coach etc. To be more honest with myself and others (hold space and expect others to hold space for me), to practice what I preach (honest and authentic) and shake rattle and role (stretch, take risks and grow).

I also continually re-visit a need to ensure that I am surrounding myself in an environment that fosters the type of growth I seek for myself.  Surrounding myself with others who aren’t willing to stretch and take risks, be honest and authentic and hold caring, and committed space for me, is a lot of work.  There’s the old saying that when the rising tide raises the water level in the marina all the boats rise with it.  Conversely, if I’m boating with others that are draining the marina of water, I too am affected.

Today let’s set sail with a clear view and direction.  While I might encounter some bad weather and rough seas, I know my destination and am quite willing and determined to get there.  Bon Voyage!!

”Blessings on your journey”