And I love that?

Day 3

Most every night if I wakeup, I have some kind of an experience.  Last night, I woke up feeling alone. Not scared or fearful, just alone.  Until I fell asleep again, I lay there with that thought, why do I feel alone?  As I sit here this morning after my meditation and putting the final touches on a memorial video honoring families we served this past year, I’m feeling confused.  Are we alone? Are we living and dying on our own?  Every one of those 65 pictures I placed on the video timeline died and lived on their own.  Their stories reflecting a past of experience shared by many, weaving a tapestry of many colors and size I know little about.  How did they work with that? How do I work with that? It makes the times in which I live feel different somehow.  When I look at the pictures I see faces of every age and circumstance, young, old, sick, healthy.  The stories peel off in all directions with the final outcome the same.

So, I took a break from writing this post as the conclusion to my thinking was “OK, I’m alone” and I wasn’t happy about how that felt.  After all, I’ve studied, researched, and believe in a universal consciousness and that we are all connected and one with each other, yet I’m still feeling alone.  Whats up with that?  If I really believed that, I shouldn’t feel alone, right?   In the car as I drove to the lake this morning, I remembered the saying “and I love that“.  Kyle Cease taught us to use this when we needed a wake up call.  As soon as I thought those words, my feeling of being alone changed in an instant “and I love that”.  A smile returned to my face, the struggle, the internal fight of feeling alone, gone.  Try it yourself sometime.  I switched the radio station to some christmas carols and the song Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas came on, these words specifically.

Once again as in olden days
Happy golden days of yore
Faithful friends who are dear to us
Will be near to us, once more

Someday soon we all will be together
If the fates allow
Until then we’ll to muddle through somehow
So have yourself a merry little Christmas now

With all my muddling done for the moment, I’ll rest assured that faithful friends who are dear to us will be near to us, once more.


“Blessings on your journey”

Day two – Meet my mentor

Day two is upon me, and as I awoke this morning and in my meditation I had many fond thoughts of my mentor on this journey, Kyle Cease.  Kyle is an amazing creature/person in helping people in transformational ways.  Our small group in Los Angeles spent three full days with him and his team and I wanted you to meet him.  What he speaks of in his video below is what I am practicing in my meditation and blogging.  Leaping is optional!

Here is information from his website at 

We all have excuses to avoid our infinite potential. We have trained ourselves to constantly come up with reasons not to meditate, create, play, exercise, let go and go after what we want.

“I would love to go and just meditate but I am too busy.  I have to work and make money.” Is it possible that we are actually losing money by staying in a career that isn’t fulfilling us?

Kyle Cease believes that spending time at a job that you don’t like (even if it pays 1000’s of dollars per hour) is nothing compared to what you are actually capable of if you would just face yourself and move towards your heart.

Kyle also believes in the possibility that a true self connection could also be the key to a massive amount of impact, health improvement, loss of addictions, release of anxiety and much, much more…… and he is ready to put that belief to the test.

In this video series, Kyle is going to spend two hours a day with a new self connecting intention. Every day, for 100 days, he is going to make a video about what he is discovering.

You are welcome to watch these videos, or also self connect in your own way.

In this video, Kyle explains his new challenge, and why he is doing it.


“Blessings on your journey”

My new blog

Today I’m beginning my journey of writing and sharing my thoughts, insights and dreams on “Living and Dying”.

Today I’m beginning my journey of writing and sharing my thoughts, insights and dreams on “Living and Dying”.

(find at

Eight months ago I spent an intense weekend in Los Angeles with some amazing individuals dedicated to living a more purpose driven life.  As we sat together in a space of love and acceptance we listened to the stories of our lives, the stories of do and can’t.  While it was everyone’s intention to live a “I can do it” life all of us found we most often found ourselves living in the “I can’t” space.  Collectively we all committed to changing the way we went about our daily lives with the intention of creating new strategies, habits and ways of living our lives.  While I have not missed one day of my one hour meditation (pretty impressive, I must say), I have not done much more.  All of my house guests in our group left Los Angeles dedicated to daily meditation and producing 100 days of videos documenting their experiences.  In review of their efforts I am continually amazed by their growth and commitment to its value.  I on the other hand, used publishing my new book as my new life strategy, because the video thing didn’t quite feel right to me.  With all the best intentions of marketing and selling my book I left Los Angeles to begin my new purpose driven life.  The purpose of becoming a writer, speaker, educator, etc. or so I thought.  Very soon I found myself in turmoil with the publisher over printing issues and errors.  I had issues with the cover design and perseverated for weeks over a final copy.  I created months of angst and struggle kicking and screaming through the publishing process.  Looking back, I struggled with committing to changing my habits, and creating new ways of living my life (leaping).  So, I sat there every morning meditating and then went about doing the same old thing, nothing.

Today I begin to share my blog for at least 100 days about my experience with a purpose driven life.  I call it “living and dying” because I see living as moving forward and embracing change and dying as just sitting here.  Today, not wanting to die, I begin my journey.  Wish me luck and feel free to join me and consider finding your own voice to share in our world.  I welcome comments and discussion and I will do the best I can to participate.

To follow my blog click the link  (not easily found on your phone) and you will receive my daily blog in your email.

“Blessing on your journey”

Dr. Alan D. Wolfelt Author, Educator, Grief Counselor Director, Center for Loss and Life Transition

It is the rare funeral director who understands how to serve grieving families with genuine empathy and lives an open-hearted, on-purpose life, personally and professionally. Such a funeral director makes a transformative difference in the lives of thousands.Such a funeral director as Mark Anthony. His words of wisdom in this insightful book will help the readers befriend loss, grief, and death so that they might truly live their precious days here on earth.

Dr. Alan D. Wolfelt Author, Educator, Grief Counselor Director, Center for Loss and Life Transition

Dr. William G. Hoy, FT Clinical Professor of Medical Humanities Baylor University

Principles are borne best on the wings of a story.  With warmth, compassion, candor, and humor, Mark weaves together a tapestry that considers death, consolation, family struggles, abandonment, joy, pure love, and a host of other human experiences. Though this little volume is filled with spiritual musings, his storytelling never resorts to a “preachy” tone. Instead, he gently leads readers through a careful consideration of what it means to make deep, loving connections—with our families, our friends, our colleagues, and our world. In a day when there is so much incivility in public speech, his words are a breath of fresh air, as calming as a warm summer breeze.

Dr. William G. Hoy, FT Clinical Professor of Medical Humanities Baylor University

Bob Cannan CEO, Eagle Productivity Solutions

Mark Anthony has written a book that is so unique, you will never read another like it. He’s a funeral director. But it’s not a book about “My life within the funeral profession,” or “Behind the scenes in the funeral business,” or even his musings on how he copes with his profession. The title says it well. It’s about living and dying.

This is a clear and direct exposition of what he’s come to believe about life during this exceptional, eyes-wide-open stream of experience in dealing with death. The intensity of it has drawn him in to the roots and branches of our families, our strengths and weaknesses, our days of clarity, our nights of blindness. He has found interest and learning in unexpected places, and brings them to our attention. And he shows us important differences in the way we live and die. He states his conclusions, too.

Bob Cannan CEO, Eagle Productivity Solutions

W. Kenneth Williams, retired pastor, First Baptist Church of Rochester, NY

This book is a meeting place of science and theology, traditional culture and recent innovations, religious rituals and emotional need. But it is, first and foremost, a personal testimony offered in compelling story. It is Mark Anthony’s story, and his ruminations about life, loss, rituals surrounding death, and the emotional connections that build and support human community Readers from all walks of life will be enriched, and communities will be strengthened, and healing of the bereaved will take place because Mark Anthony has chosen to tell his story.


W. Kenneth Williams, retired pastor, First Baptist Church of Rochester, NY, and Chaplain Emeritus, Brighton Fire Department, Brighton, NY. Williams has served as grief counselor in pastoral practice and as critical incident stress management consultant for emergency services. He resides in Durham, North Carolina.