My dear friend

Day 26

Sometimes when we break a habit or addiction we find ourselves missing it like a dear friend


Over a year ago I took to loosing some weight and dropped forty five pounds.  I am still holding to my new weight goals.  Recently I took three months off from drinking any alcohol.  I made it through a couple of months, but found myself back to it before the three months were up.

Whenever we make the effort to free ourselves of an addiction or a habit we no longer need or want we often find ourselves missing the old pattern as we would a familiar friend. This sounds counterintuitive, because we think we should instinctively gravitate toward that which is good for us. And yet, it makes a lot of sense when you consider that we are creatures of habit. This is why we gravitate to people and places–and patterns of behavior–that make us feel comfortable. Therefore, many of the habits we form are not conscious and are based instead on learned behavior from role models who were not always making the healthiest decisions.

Most addictions in my opinion begin as a way of avoiding feelings that are uncomfortable, so it makes sense that stopping the addiction means, for a time, a fair amount of discomfort. The same, of course, is true of habits that we have developed over time that we are ready to release. Just knowing that this is hard, and having compassion for ourselves as we work through this process, can help us to stay the course. It’s also helpful to remember that in time we can establish new, healthier patterns, and the yearning for the old ones will hopefully disappear. Ten years ago I gave up cigarettes and to this day do not have any urge to smoke.  My eating habits are different today then in the past, but I’m finding comfort in the fact I’m eating better foods.  Although I gave up drinking for a time, I realize I still miss the social and relaxation components of it today.

The only way to get to this new place is to endure a time of difficulty, which is a challenge we can confidently handle, if we remember that it will lead to the change we seek in our lives. Our bodies, hearts, and minds always need time to adjust to a new way of doing things, but they will adapt, and even become our allies, if we remain true to our vision of a new way. I think I’ll try with the alcohol again come January! Maybe even try exercising!!

“Blessings on your journey”

Winter wonderland

Day 25

Last night was our first snowfall of the season with 4-6 inches of snow falling by morning. There is something magical and energizing to wake up to a fresh new snowfall.  I can remember the joy we had as kids as we raced out into its freshness to build forts, throw snowballs, and play.  Back then, the snow came and stayed for all of the winter.  The roads would stay packed with snow initially and sledding on the local hills took up a lot of our free time.  As we aged, we began skiing and traveling to the different mountains in our area on the weekends and school holidays.  We bonded with friends and family, as we tirelessly endured and thoroughly enjoyed the cold and wintry months. It was good.  As we entered our own parenting days, we shared our experiences as children with our own kids.  Many weekends and school holidays spent on the ski hills with new friends and family.

Today I am grateful for the new snow.  Tomorrow may be different, but I think not.  It brings a sheer beauty to nature and our environment, wrapping the grey and dead looking landscape with its fresh clean look.  It is a joy to behold.  It will never get old for me, and I look forward to tomorrow.  I hope you do too, wherever you are.

“Blessings on your journey”

Why is it so scary?

Today I’m feeling scared, and I’m not sure what’s causing it. Is it because I’m blogging and putting my shit out there in the universe for all to see?  Am I scared because I may be ridiculed, laughed at, not liked, perceived a failure?  Or, am I scared because the energy in our world is freaking scary? All the presidents men, the media and the entertainers and the politicians are scary.  People full of hate are scary! Will all of this insanity pull me down in its hole?  Is that why I’m scared?


Am I’m scared about blogging? I guess I’m in some pretty good company then. Walt Disney (first animation company went bankrupt, was told he wasn’t creative enough), Albert Einstein (didn’t speak till four and read until seven – parents and teachers thought he was mentally handicapped), Vincent Van Gogh (he only sold one painting in his lifetime), Michael Jordan (cut from his high school basketball team) the list goes on. There is no success without failure. Decide what is important to you and take huge steps (leaps) everyday even though it doesn’t seem like it’s working. Success doesn’t happen without failures. It’s reality, and it takes practice to get good at.

Am I scared about the negative energy in the world? I know I’m not alone here.  All I can do is take it moment by moment and day by day.  I will try to limit my news time and place more time on my health and my family.  I will try and hold all others opinions as just that, opinions.  There is no power in thought and opinions, unless we give them power.  Wayne Dyer used to always say,  “Change the way you look at the world, and the world you look at changes”.  Know you are not alone! For I am with you, and it might get scary!

“Blessings on your journey”

Life’s review

During one’s final life review, the most shocking thing for baby souls is discovering how much love they were ALWAYS bathed in… that they failed to feel.

For young souls, it’s discovering how much love they were ALWAYS bathed in… that they failed to feel.

And for old souls, it’s discovering how much love they were ALWAYS bathed in… that they failed to feel.

“Blessing on your journey”


Today, was an incredible day!!

560 male individuals gathered at THE COUNTR CLUB OF ROCHESTER to celebrate 100+ years of tradition, the annual pig roast.   I was taken aback, and fulfilled by its power .  It isn’t often that I see so many men together in one place for so long.

Over the many hours I was there, I had conversations regarding the political conditions around sexual harassment  and  assault and what It means to our world, amongst  others.

It would it appear that we hope to have man’s perspective and opinion yet we want it to be one we agree with.

“Blessings on your journey


There is no keeping score

There is no scorekeeping.

Everyone lives each day for him or herself, no matter what they did.

No one owes anything to anyone, no matter what happened.

And from this, what I hope we most get, is that whatever we do next, we do it for the joy it brings you.

Rock on,

“Blessings on your journey”